TRIPOLI, LYBIA—With rumors swirling around the status of the highly anticipated SWAG FEST (Senior World Autocratic Gala and Fashion Event Spectacular in Tripoli) due to ill-timed popular uprisings and subsequent bombing by the West, Lybian leader and dictator debonair Mu’uamar Gaddafi told Iron E-News that the show, “must, and will, go on!”
In his speech on opening day, surrounded by other leader/models such as King Hamad of Bahrain, Islam Karimov of Uzbekistan, Gurbanguly Berdymuhammedov of Turkmenistan, Ali Zadari of Pakistan, and President Saleh of Yemen, Gadhafi celebrated the show’s life and resilience through the best and worst of times.
“When Ben-ali and Mubarak cancelled at the last moment, I was afraid we were going to have to postpone. But after receiving so much opposition from people who know nothing about fashion, I knew we were on the right track. Fashion, if you will, pulls on the turban of the people (or, as you in the West might say, “Pushes the envelope”). However, we intend to do much more than that—we intend to yank the “turban” off, rip it into a thousand turban pieces, burn those pieces into ashes, and then burn those ashes into smaller ashes that get in the eyes and become extremely irritating!”
This annual historic event, though criticized by many top fashionistas for its exclusive nature, has garnered worldwide attention and major financial support from the globes most powerful countries.
“For all their disparaging rhetoric officially (and yes, the constant shelling too), we know we can always count on our Western friends. (Becoming emotional) I cannot help but think that none of us would be here today if it weren’t for nations like the U.S. and England. Their governments’ faithful and extremely generous financial backing over the years is what really put SWAG on the map.”
After the show, Mr. Gaddafi was asked about how he viewed his work and role as the world’s longest trend-setting dictator.
“I see myself as more of a Bono or Angelina Jolie—except without the ego, of course.”