The 2012 European Cup, according to commentators and fans alike, is shaping up to be one of the most memorable soccer events in a long time.
“In terms of highlight footage (no pun intended),” said one giddy ESPN broadcaster. “There’s never been anything like it. We probably have hours and hours of ‘oh-my-god-that-was-so-close’ moments.”
And that is saying something. For never has any sport, in the history of all sports, had so many highlights filled with tantalizing near misses and extremely impressive fails.
“You know, I’ve been shooting at the goal and missing my whole life,” said Mark Burry, former striker for his high school team. “But there’s just something about watching them miss at this level. It’s incredible!”
Mr. Burry, though one of the few American fans here at the event, perfectly expresses the sentiment of millions of fanatics around the world–where every awe-inspiring miss carries a special place in their desperate, futbol-filled hearts.
“Yah! Euro Cup rocks!,” exclaimed one ecstatic German fan between gulps. “There was one shot in the match against Denmark that literally shaved the paint off the goal post! It doesn’t get any better than that. Auf ghets Deutschland!”